What to do if you can't keep a promise to yourself

Have you ever told yourself you were going to do something… and then NOT done it?

Maybe it was deciding not to drink for Sober October. Or going to the gym at 5 am.  Or reading 20 pages a day.

Heck, you may not even remember what you promised yourself to since you were so far off from ever following through!

If you’ve ever broken a promise to yourself, you have to read this.

You guys probably know two of the hottest books in the personal development world right now are by Rachel Hollis:  Girl, Wash Your Face and Girl, Stop Apologizing.  

If you’re like me, you probably love and agree with SO MUCH of what Rachel shares.

But there’s one thing. One BIG thing I don’t love about what Rachel says.

I believe she's 100% incorrect about this:

In Girl, Wash Your Face she says that it's wrong to break a promise to yourself.

And that if you're someone who breaks a promise to yourself, it means you won't accomplish what you set out to.

Maybe you’ve heard this and felt discouraged.

Or maybe you’ve never heard this and you just hate that you can’t seem to do what you say you will do.

If you’ve ever beat yourself up about it, or wondered WHY, why, WHY you can’t seem to, you’re not alone.

And here’s the good news: I believe that even if you break a promise to yourself, it doesn’t mean success isn’t in the cards for you.

The better news?  From the research I've done on habits and what I've seen to be true with my dozens of students, you are definitely still capable of achieving your goals.

Still not convinced?  

Here’s Exhibit A:  Me.

I was a prime candidate for breaking promises to myself… and then guilting myself for it. Over and over again.

I’d always heard that exercise "should" be easy and I should do it for myself.

But truthfully, when I put a "reminder" in my calendar to go for a run, I rarely do it.

If I tell myself I'll go to the gym a few times this week, it doesn't happen.

I know this about myself. And instead of beating myself up, I work with it.

When DO I work out?

When it's a workout I really enjoy and I'm with fabulous friends.

And when I've signed up for a class and have to pay to cancel (I'm a cheapo for these kinds of things).

So what do I do?

I USE this to make sure I get the exercise my body craves.

I started a running club.  

I book classes online the week before - and then go to them!

I meet friends for a swim or a walk.

I find someone to babysit and come over while I work out.  

I USE the fact that I'm really good at being accountable to others TO my advantage.

The end result? I exercise, consistently. I just do it in a way that works for me.

What is the problem I DO see?!

SO many people are beating themselves up for having different motivators, strengths and ways they work best.  

Here are two things you need to know:

1)  Some people do better when they promise or make commitments to others. That's ok: just work with what works for you.

2) You've GOT to know yourself. There is no expert in the world (not me, not Rachel), that can tell you what will work well for you.  

YOU need to learn about yourself. Look back at what's worked & what hasn't. Recreate the good and stop the bad.  

If you already know how you work best, great. Keep doing that. Do more of it to make sure you stay on course towards your goals.

If you don’t know how you work best, look at what’s worked for you in the past.

At the end of the week, what are the things that you did accomplish?  

And why did you do THOSE things over other things on your “to-do” list?

STILL not sure? That’s ok.

I’ve created a quick and easy quiz to find out YOUR GOAL-GETTING STYLE so you can learn how YOU work best.

Once you know HOW you work, HOW you best succeed and accomplish goals... well, THEN you're unstoppable!

So, my friend, stop beating yourself up over the promises you break to yourself.

And work with what works for you.

Get accountability if you need it. Take the GOAL-GETTING STYLE quiz and learn specific strategies and tips to help YOU get the goals you want!

And of course, I’ll see you on Facebook and Instagram LIVE tonight around 8:30 pm PST, to dive deeper into this topic and share more strategies so you can STOP breaking promises to yourself.

I woke up in a Penthouse

6 years ago, I came to Vancouver to run my first BMO Half Marathon and I was in awe of the city.

I loved every moment I spent here and realized I would never live here.

"Vancouver is too expensive. My husband is a small town boy. We have houses, mortgages and real jobs", I told myself.

No matter how alive I felt as I walked the streets, and how joyful my soul was here, I told myself it would never happen.

4 years ago, I came to run the Half Marathon for a second time, after a health scare that woke me the f*ck up.

At that point, Troy and I knew we would be moving to Vancouver.

We were so excited for a new adventure, and still totally intimidated by the size of the city and the cost of housing.

We didn’t have a place to live, or jobs, but we had an idea and enough courage to risk having to move into our parent’s basement if our business ventures (in real estate and beyond), failed.

This morning, I woke up in my beautiful, downtown Vancouver penthouse.

Last week, one of my best friends all these years later visited, and I got to cheer for her and all the runners for the same BMO Half Marathon where this story begins.

I got to bring my daughter Sonoma along and teach her about hard work, dedication and cheering on your community through the runners around us.

This week, I’m one of the city’s top bloggers and run my dream coaching + speaking business.

In the last few days, I have literally pinched myself several times, and woken up wondering, “is this seriously my life?”

I can’t believe how much has changed in those years.

I’m sharing this not to brag.

I’m sharing this because no matter what seems impossible, or intimidating today, it’s possible for YOU.

6 years ago, living in Vancouver was not possible for me, because I didn’t allow myself to imagine it.

But as soon as I shifted my mindset, believed I could do it and committed to finding a way, magic happened.

Whatever it is that you want, I can guarantee you that if you DON’T let yourself want it, desire it, and believe it’s possible for you, you won’t ever get it.

Simply giving yourself permission to want it and call it for yourself will open up more opportunities than you can imagine.

In fact, it’s the only way you’ll ever have what you want in life.

Today, as you read this, I want you to allow yourself permission to dream big, and dream out loud.

When I ask “what do you want in your life?”, shout it out, unfiltered.

Truthfully, I don’t care if you scream it from the rooftop or put it in your journal, but give yourself the permission to state it, and hold it in your heart and your mind.

In 1 year, a lot can change. In 5 years, you can live a radically different life.

But if you don’t do something different, and believe that you and your life can change, then you will be in the exact same place in 1 year, 5 years and 20 years.

If there’s nothing more or different you want in your life, this is not for you.

But if there’s something in your heart that is calling you - a farm, a trip to Paris, selling your first piece of art, or singing in a choir - it’s up to you to take the first step.

The first step is owning your dream. The second step is asking “How is it possible?”

After that, it’s just putting one foot in front of the other.

If I’d had a crystal ball 6 years ago, I wouldn’t have believed it.

Today, I believe anything is possible, and my dreams are bigger than ever.

The difference is that now I have the courage to say them out loud, the tenacity to keep going for them and the belief that they are all going to come true.

As you read this, I want you to have the courage to share your dream, out loud. Claim it as yours. Sure, you are not guaranteed to get it, but I promise you that if you never truly declare it as a dream of yours, you will never achieve it.

The odds are stacked infinitely in the favour of those brave enough to have a big dream. In the words of Steve Jobs, “those who are crazy enough to think they can change the world usually do.”

Here’s my version: “those crazy enough to think they can change their life are the ones who usually do.”

Be the one that’s crazy enough to dream big and get what you want - and you’ll be the one who does.

This belief, this mindset, is how you start to make the impossible, possible.

Now, go shout out your dreams, believe they are possible…. And do the work to make all your crystal ball desires reality!

Still pinching myself over here…

Lisa Michaud

PS. It's Tuesday & I'm going LIVE on Instagram and Facebook tonight around 8:30 pm PST.

Catch me live or the replay and get ready to make the impossible, possible!  

See you tonight!

Will you achieve your goals? Answer this question

Here’s a bold question for you:

How many people do you piss off on a daily, weekly or monthly basis?

How often do you have people disagreeing with you?

Do you ruffle feathers and challenge those around you?

If you can say “all the time”, “too many to count” and “heck yes”, this post isn’t for you.

But if your answers involved “no-one”, “never”, “not me”, you need to read this.

If you aren’t pissing anyone off, you aren’t doing anything interesting.

And yes – this post might trigger you and piss you off, but at least I’m doing something interesting.

Here are some more bold questions for you:

Are you as successful as you want to be?

Have you achieved your goals and dreams, consistently?

Does it ever feel like no matter how hard you try, or what you try, that you can’t break to the next level?

Does it seem like there’s something stopping you from really achieving your goals… but you can’t figure out what it is?

I feel you. I hear you.

I was there a few short months ago.

I just turned 32 and had hit a lot of great milestones in my life.

But it felt like I’d hit my limit of success. And no matter what I did, I couldn’t break through.

I spent a few days, reflecting, trying to figure out what was holding me back.

I realized I was:

·      Always wanting/needing to be the “smartest person in the room”

·      Never asking for help, or wanting to inconvenience people who were more successful than me

·      Holding back on tools, ideas, quotes, truths that would help my clients and my community.

What I realized as I started digging into these things was an ugly, hideous truth:

These were all based on my need to be liked.

My deep, deep desire to be liked.  My insatiable need to please others, to be nice, to be a good girl.

I just sighed reading this out loud because it’s so ugly to admit.

But it is the truth.

And since then, I’ve uncovered SO many more areas in my life where I’ve held back because I just want to be nice, and I want to be liked.

Can you relate to this?

Recently, I’ve started sharing on this topic and I’ve been overwhelmed by the response from women like you.

Overwhelmed – and saddened – that it’s not just me who struggles with this.

Do you ever find yourself going along to get along?

Maybe you’re in a group of people and someone asks what everyone feels like for dinner.

Do you say what you want? Or do you quietly wait for everyone else to chime in?

Do you shy away from sharing a great new book you’re reading because you don’t want your friends to make fun of you for reading “self-help”?

Do you avoid talking about your success because you know your family is just going to roll their eyes and make some comment about how “money isn’t everything” or “success doesn’t last”?

Be honest: do you tip-toe around what you really need, or really think, or really want to say?

You are not alone.

And you DO have a choice:

1)  Continue to stay where you are and stay safe, making everyone else happy.

2)  Or decide to do what’s going to make YOU happy.

Think about what you want in your life – and know that YOU, ONLY YOU, have to live with your regret if you don’t make this the life you want.

Hear that again:

No-one else has to live with your regret.

Not your mom. Not your partner. Not your “bff”.

Only you will carry your own regret.

NOW, are you on board now to get rid of that people pleasing sh*t?

Good.

If this is you, you know the first step is just admitting it. Understanding it. And being ok with it.

The second step is to start building that truth muscle. To start speaking up, sharing what you believe and owning it.

You can do this in small and big ways.

When your colleague does a coffee run, give them your ridiculous full-page Starbucks order.  (Because it’s delicious and you know you’d do it for them).

When your friend asks what you want to do this weekend, tell them you want to go nerd out on your favourite movie.  Or that you feel like dressing up and dancing your heart out.

When your family talks about how what you do is a “pyramid scheme” for the 80th time during dinner, step in and let them know how it makes you feel and what it’s been able to do for your life and community.

And if you have to, let them know you will stop showing up to dinner if this is how every meal is going to go down. (GASP! I know… this is big).

Oh, and remember if you aren’t pissing off at least a few people in your life, you aren’t doing anything interesting enough. So start pissing people off!

The third step is to go deeper and uncover what it is that makes you want so deeply to please people.

Is it because you want to fit in? Were you bullied as a child and now that manifests as you always wanting to be included?  (This is a big one for me!).

Is it because you want to be easy-going? Maybe your parents separated when you were young and by being the good girl, you still go to spend time with your mom on weekends.

I know. Sh*t just got real here.

But you’ve got to get to the root.

Journal on it. Talk it out with a friend, mentor, coach or therapist.

Meditate on it.

Challenge yourself to bust through your limiting beliefs and shine your bright light and your truths!

Know that this isn’t a quick fix. You may not let go of all your people-pleasing tendencies by the end of this post.

But you can start today by opening your eyes to the fact that if you’re stuck in life, it might be because you’re letting other people’s opinions be more important than what you want.

You start today.

You start by being honest about how hard it is to not be liked. To not always be the nice girl.

You start by being honest about what it is you want.

You start by being bold enough to GO for what you want, even if it’s not going to make everyone happy.

But you’re going for it because it’s going to make YOU happy.

You show up authentically, and show up for your goals and dreams.

Start pissing some people off.

Do interesting things.

Break out of your limits.

Go for that dream life. And get your goals.

Because you get to live with the life you created. Live the life you dream of, the one you know is meant for you.

Trust me, they’re a heck of a lot sweeter than living with your regrets.

You need to know this:

Despite your deepest fears, most people will NOT come after you with pitch forks (like I imagined they would).

Most people won’t even blink an eye with you being honest.

Other people might.

And if you lose a few people along the way?

Know they will be replaced by people who will support you as you speak your truth.

You will be surrounded by other people who encourage you to read the “self help”.

You’ll be encouraged by friends and family who are excited to see you succeed.

And you’ll be doing it on YOUR terms.

Go piss a few people off, today.

As always, join me LIVE tonight, on Facebook and Instagram around 8:30 pm PST and let's talk about all things people-pleasing.

Bring your question and fears: let's bust them and piss people off together!

Feel like you can't get ahead? This is for you

Does it ever feel like you're stuck?

Can you relate to feeling like you just can't get ahead?

Uhh... who HASN'T felt that way at some point?!

Well, today I'm taking a coaching lesson from my 1 year old daughter, Sonoma.

Because in this picture, she's literally stuck.

Stuck in a foam pit.

It would be so easy for her to get discouraged.

Think things like:

"I'm stuck here."

"I've never gotten out before."

"No-one's ever done it."

"I'll never be able to do it."

"It's too hard."

"I'm not good enough/strong enough/old enough."

"Why won't anyone help me?"

Ok, now be honest: have you EVER thought any of those thoughts above?

Have you ever thought:

“I’ve never done it before so I don’t know if I can.”

“I’m not good enough.”

“I don’t know how I’d ever do it.”

You’re not alone.

BUT those thoughts will NOT serve you as you work towards your goals.

You set your goals because there is something you want.

You want to create financial stability and freedom.

You want to live in your dream city.

You want to feel strong and healthy.

You set goals because there’s something in your life you want more of.

You want more date nights with your sexy partner.

You want more sunset patio drinks with great friends.

You want more time to explore the world.

You set goals because there’s something you want to change, or create to make your life even more amazing.

You’re so over cleaning your house instead of playing with your kids.

You’re done playing small and ready to be a leader in your community.

You’re ready to take the promotion, and your business to the next level.

And to get those goals, you’re going to have to get unstuck.

Alright, back to Sonoma for just a second and check out that cute face again for maximum effect.

Instead of getting frustrated, or staying stuck, here's what her face tells me:

"Woah, this is fun!"

"I just fell and it didn't even hurt."

"I can't hurt myself or fall in here."

"I wonder what will happen if I try......"

"Look, mom, I’ve got this figured out!"

"What a fun challenge!"

"I'm doing it!"

"I'm awesome!"

Ok, I definitely took some liberties with some of those, but you can tell from her face that I'm not far off.

So.... what happens between childhood when possibility is endless.... and adulthood where it feels like the struggle is real?

I don't know the answer to that, but I do know this:

In childhood, you conquer new things, ALL the time.

You learn to crawl. Touch your face.

Walk. Talk.

Sing the alphabet.

Do math. Read. Apologize.

Dance. Run. Play basketball.

And you can do all those things in just a few short years.

So tell me again... WHY can't you do what YOU want?

Why can't you write your book?

Why can't you learn Italian?

Why can't you find a way to hire a cleaner?

Why can't you create beautiful art?

Why can’t you retire your husband and travel the world?

…. That’s what I thought.

There's NO reason why not.

Here's what I know for sure:  

We can ALL learn from a child's mindset and world of possibility.

Today, I want you to take on a new mindset.... and keep it.

That place you're stuck?

Say it with me:

"OOh, this is a fun challenge."

"I can totally do this."

"I learned math - THIS is way more fun!"

Even if you're stuck in a foam pit like Sonoma, look at the world like she does:

Full of infinite possibility and the ability for you to get whatever it is your heart desires!

Today - RIGHT NOW - choose ONE new empowering phrase to describe your situation.

And adopt it.

Write it on a sticky note and put it on your desktop, or your mirror to see every day.

Find a song with those lyrics in it and play it.

Remember a reason why YOU’RE AWESOME and put a picture that reminds you of that as your phone background.

Hang out with kids and watch how they see EVERYTHING as possible and take on that attitude.

Go ahead.

Get yourself out of that foam pit, get yourself unstuck and go get those dreams!

PS. I'll see you LIVE tonight on Facebook and Instagram to dive deeper into the mindset shift required to get YOU UNSTUCK.⁣⁣⁣

See, my friend, there's no reason why you can't move forward with whatever it is you want.⁣⁣⁣ Tonight, around 8:30pm PST, I'll be going live and I want to see you.⁣⁣⁣

Let me know where you're stuck and I'll be there to support you and help you take two steps forward (and maybe only one step back, because it's life!). ⁣⁣⁣

See you tonight! ⁣⁣⁣

How to piss off everyone you know in one blog post

Today’s post has the potential to piss off everyone I know.

So why bother writing it?

Because everyone needs to read, and understand this.

Even if it means triggering or upsetting a few people along the way.

So, let’s go. Let’s shake things up friend!

We all know the clichés about baby boomers and millennials.  

Baby boomers can’t use technology.

They’re set in their ways.

Baby boomers worked in the same job for 30 years, got benefits and are now living cushy retirements (if they’ll retire, that is).

And like every generation before them, they think the younger generation is screwed up.

This is nothing new, by the way. Going all the way back to Ancient Greece, there’s been a belief that “young people today are nothing like we were”.

Enter millennials.

Millennials are lazy, entitled, narcissistic snowflakes.

They don’t want to work hard and expect things to just happen for them.

I am a millennial.

But what I’m going to say is not in defence of millennials.

Or baby boomers.

In fact, there’s one critical thing both generations have dead wrong.

And I believe it’s impacting everything from our perceptions of each other, to the ability of many people in both of these generations to find true happiness.

The problem is that neither generation understands the difference between short- and long-term struggle.

And there is a KEY difference.

Now, I’m using the different generations to oversimplify these beliefs so let’s remove the stereotypes and just talk about people.

Let’s call these two types of people the forever-strugglers and the struggle avoiders.

Let’s start with the forever-strugglers.

We all know the people.

You know the co-worker who hates their job and says “it’s work. You’re not supposed to enjoy it.”

Maybe you’ve got the friend in a relationship who says “marriage is just hard but there’s nothing I can do now.”

Maybe you’ve heard some of these words coming out of your own mouth.

This is a mindset that doesn’t serve anyone.

There is nothing about life that should be inherently difficult, consistently; especially not in the country most of you are reading this from.

And yet, somewhere, somehow, you’ve been conditioned to believe that in order to be “successful” or to have a steady job/buy a house/retire, you need to suffer. And struggle.

This simply isn’t true.

If this resonates in any way, I challenge you to question your assumption and STOP SETTLING.  More on this in a minute.

Now, let’s talk about the other end of the spectrum.

The struggle avoiders.

This is the person who wants a change, or has a goal, but won’t take one step closer because it will mean discomfort.

Struggle avoiders are the people who won’t take the night class because for 3 months, or even 3 years, it’s going to be hard.

Even if that’s exactly what it will take to finally speak Spanish fluently, or start their own public relations business.

You know this friend.

The one that says they want to buy a car or start an RRSP but won’t stop having boozy brunches, or get a side hustle to save money quicker.

Or the one who quits their new job 3 months in because they’re not the CEO yet and are sick of fetching coffee.

So why did I write this knowing it has the potential to offend literally everyone in my life?

Because I hope it will shed a different light on struggle: for everyone.

The truth is, we all need to struggle, sometimes. In the short-term.

But we cannot build a life based on constant struggle. Or constant compromise, unhappiness or discomfort.

You should never plan to be in a career you dislike for 30 years. Or even 5 years.

But you can’t avoid some challenges and some struggle if you ever want to change your circumstance and your life.

When Troy and I wanted to buy our first house together, we set a goal of saving 20% down so we wouldn’t have to pay for mortgage insurance.

And we only had 4 months to save about $80,000.

This meant that even though I was in a professional career, I stayed in my serving job that whole time, and took extra shifts.

This meant Troy worked extra shifts in his job, often on weekends.

We both took every penny from our bonuses and put it towards our down payment.

For those 4 months, we stopped all unnecessary spending.

We went out for dinner once in those 4 months, to celebrate a friend’s birthday.

That was it. And if you know me, you know I LOVE a fabulous dinner. Often.

But we had a goal and it meant we would need to make some sacrifices in the short-term.

We worked damn hard. We put in every effort.

And we crushed our goal.

But it was completely unsustainable.

It was necessary and I have zero regrets.

It was short-term pain, for long-term gain.

There are many times in my life where I’ve had to push myself, and be challenged, and struggle. I look back now, and smile.

Training for half-marathons.

Creating and leading a national Leadership Conference for 3 years.

Working on multi-million-dollar initiatives in my corporate life.

Completing an 8-month community leadership program while also planning a wedding.

Having a newborn baby.

All these times were challenging and I put in an unsustainable amount of effort to make them happen (and keep my baby alive).

It makes me proud that I’m hard-working and able to focus on what’s important to me.

And it also makes me hyper-aware that those are seasons in life that are busier, and they require different sacrifices that I’m not always willing to make.

I am not willing to work two jobs for the rest of my life.

I am not willing to never see my husband.

I’m not willing to wake up every 2 hours forever.

I am not willing to go without delicious food (#sorrynotsorry).

But for the short term, for the bigger picture of what I want in my life, I can do anything.

What has helped make me successful is knowing the difference short-term and long-term struggle.

What makes me successful is my ability to get clear and focused around a specific goal and do the work to get there.

I understand that I do not want long-term struggle and I will not put myself in a situation that I don’t like, that doesn’t work for me, when there’s no clear goal and no end in sight.

Here’s what I want you to know:

If you’re in a tough season of life, or not fulfilled and there’s no end in sight, don’t just accept “that’s the way life is.”  Or that life is inherently hard.

Ask yourself what it will take to break out of this cycle of struggle, and start taking action.

Here’s the other thing I want you to know.

To create something meaningful, or to achieve something great, there will be challenging times in your life.

And to get what you really want, sometimes, you have to jump feet first into a time of short-term struggle and challenge.

The forever strugglers are those people who set up and ACCEPT their lives to be unsustainably difficult or unhappy. All the time. And there’s no end goal. It’s just struggle.

The struggle avoiders are those who refuse to step into discomfort or settle for anything less than perfect, meanwhile sacrificing true meaning and not making any progress at all.  

Here’s what I want you to do:

Understand the difference between short- term and long- term struggle.

Ask yourself where, in your life, you are settling.

Where you have accepted that it’s “just hard.” 

Or it’s “just the way it is”.

And challenge yourself to change your status quo.

Whether this means not accepting you have to work a job you hate, or that you are going to “just get by”, stop assuming that your life means settling for less than what you want.

It’s also time for you to get uncomfortable.

Ask yourself where, in your life, you are avoiding challenge, discomfort or struggle, even though you know there’s something more out there for you.

If there’s a place in your life you’re unsatisfied and have a goal or bigger dream, it’s time to get uncomfortable.

It’s time to take the job that’s 3 steps “down” from the dream job and get started.

Or start your side hustle, even if it means saying goodbye to a few weeknights and weekends in the next 6 months.

If what you really want is to go on a dream trip, or put a down payment on a house, start saving.

And make it hurt.

Don’t always live in hurt.

Don’t always live in struggle.

But avoiding it is a sure-fire recipe for disappointment in life, just as much as assuming you need to struggle in order to “live a life” is.

What I want for you is two-fold, my friend.

I want you to live a life full of joy, that is fulfilling to you and what you want.

I want you to be happy and to be living your dreams.

I also want you to put in the work it takes to achieve your goals and big dreams.

Stop waiting for some day for the challenge to be easier, or for it to magically disappear.

Don’t wish it was easier; get stronger.

Don’t hope it will go away; make it go away.

Do the uncomfortable things. Challenge yourself and do the things you don’t want to do.

Do it so that in the big picture of your life, you have and most importantly, become everything you desire.

Yours,

Lisa

PS.  I hope my message was worth pissing you all off. Thank you for reading this far.

PPS.  Join me LIVE tonight as I expand my message and continue to piss people off.

You’ll find me on Facebook and Instagram Live around 8:30 pm (ish) PST – or catch the replay.

Join me live and let’s do this!

See you tonight!

The best way to set goals and actually achieve them

Would you love to know the BEST way to set goals and actually achieve them?

Do you feel like if you knew the ONE way, that ONE trick, you would be so successful?

Well, you need to hear this.

I’ve got good news, and bad news.

Let’s start with the bad news first.

There is no “best way” or “one way” or any silver bullet to help you set and actually achieve your goals.

I’m going to say this again because it’s really important to understand. But please, keep reading because there is good news coming.

There is NO one way for you to set and achieve your goals. There’s no silver bullet or guaranteed process.

Alright, onto the good news.

There are many ways to set and actually achieve your goals. And the BEST one? The best one is the one that works for you.

See, one of the (many) reasons I hate SMART goals is because they make you think there’s only one process that works.

And that’s simply not true.

Goal setting is not a one-size-fits-all model. There is no one-size-fits-all goal either.

Goals are like chocolate chip cookies.

Some people like them chewy.

Some prefer them crunchy.

And others prefer to just eat the raw cookie dough (that’s me).

We all have different recipes, different temperatures we bake them at, and shapes we prefer.

Goals are as personal as chocolate chip cookies.

There are many ways that they can work for you.

There’s a million different strategies, suggestions, and tools that are out there online.

What matters is what is going to work for YOU.

Here’s an example of me finding my own goal recipe.   

I couldn't tell you the number of times I've said I was going to go to the gym, and then didn't go. ⠀

The number of times I've put "run" in my calendar and then just didn't put on my running shoes has got to be in the billions. ⠀

For a long time, I guilted myself about this.

"Come on Lisa. You're smart... why can't you do this?"

"If you can't keep a commitment to yourself, what's wrong with you?"

Ugh. Cue the nasty thoughts, the self-doubt and worthlessness that comes with THAT sh*t. ⠀
⠀

But I've since learned to stop guilting myself about that... and instead, start working with what's best for me. ⠀

And here's how I work:

I do best when I'm committing to others. It’s not the ideal we're taught in most personal development spaces, but it's true.

When I tell others I'll go for a run with them, I show up.

When I sign up for a class, I'm there.

You see, when there's a commitment made to others, I'm FAR more likely to do it. 

I’m a social human who enjoys connecting with others for a workout, so it feels like I’m crossing off both “fun” and “work out” off my to-do list. (And nothing feels better than checking things off my list to this Type-A chick).

And if I’ve paid to do something, you better believe I’ll be there. (Thanks, dad, for teaching me to be frugal).

So instead of beating myself up and my head against the imaginary wall, I've started working with what works for me.

That's how I've run 7 half marathons. How I've learned to downward dog. How I've found so much joy and strength in exercise over the years.

If this is you - whether it's exercise, or work or any other goal - look at what makes YOU successful.

Work WITH yourself, instead of AGAINST yourself.

Think about times when you do show up for your goals.

What is working now? What has worked in the past?

What isn’t working?

Then, pivot.

Work with what works for YOU.

Because all that really matters at the end of the day is that you've achieved what you set out to. ⠀

The how? If it's working for you, then there is no problem.

And if you don’t know the how? Keep searching.

Keep trying things.

There’s a million different recipes for chocolate chip cookies online.

There’s a million different ideas, tips and strategies for achieving your goals.

The key is to keep going.

Keep trying new ideas, new strategies, and new recipes.

Whether it works for you to keep your goals crunchy, or chewy or half-baked, doesn’t matter.

What matters is that you persist. That failure isn’t an option because you’re going to figure out a way.

You will achieve all your goals when you have the courage to go for them, the curiosity to keep discovering a way, the tenacity to keep going, and the passion to bring those dreams to life. 

Find your own way. Create your own recipe..

Go get it!

Sincerely,

Lisa Michaud

Success Coach & Raw Cookie Dough aficionado

PS. Join me live tonight for my Tuesday night Facebook or Instagram Live, or make time to watch the replay.

Let’s talk about what kind of goals are going to work for you.

Join me as I share some of the best goal-setting strategies I know of and how to know what’s right for you.

See you tonight!

Do you need big goals? Can't you just be happy with what you have?

Have you ever wondered if you need a big goal? Or why you can’t just be happy?

I receive messages (and criticism) from people with questions like this often.  

And I get clients who are honest enough with me and tell me that they wonder why they need to have big goals.

“Do I need big goals?” they wonder.

Maybe you’ve wondered the same.

Do you need to feel like you’ve made a massive impact in the world and left a legacy behind?

Should you just be happy with you have?

In fact, can’t you just be happy with the present moment?

Tell me the truth: have any of these thoughts ever crossed your mind?

Don’t be shy.

These are all common questions… and hard to answer.

But I’m going to try.

Here are the SHORT answers to all these questions:

No, you don’t need big goals.

No, you don’t need to leave a massive impact in the world.

Yes, you can be happy with what you have. In fact, that sounds wonderful.

Yes, you can be satisfied with the present.

BUT before I let you walk away without a big dream, or desire to leave an impact, I need to tell you the tale of two coins.

Each day, you make choices from one of two coins:

Your best self coin.

Or your inner critic coin.

Your best self coin is the coin that you want to make decisions from, inherit beliefs from and live life from.

Your best self might believe that every day is meant to be savoured and that your biggest purpose is to find joy every day. This means slowly drinking your coffee each morning, taking the long route to the store and napping frequently. 

At the end of your life, you’d be so proud at your 80th birthday to have someone say that you showed them how to just be happy in life.

Alternatively, your best self might believe you were placed on this earth for a reason and you have big things to achieve. Maybe it’s solving world hunger or leading your local government.

At the end of your life, you’d be so proud to have someone say your leadership made a massive impact and that you changed the world in a big way.

While the actions you would take for these two life visions are both different – polar opposites in fact-, you can see how as long as you’re making a decision from your best self, that’s what matters.

Finding joy in every day or desiring to solve world hunger are two sides of the same coin.

They are two manifestations of what it might look like if you are your best self.

In fact, I believe that since it’s the same coin, you can actually have both. You can be happy with the every day, while also pursuing an impact and big goals.  

Because it’s the same coin; your best self.

Now, let’s look at the other coin. Your inner critic coin.

You have a voice that tells you that you should just be happy with what you have. It tells you to stop wanting more. Why are you never satisfied? It wonders, will you never truly be happy?  You have more than 95% of people in this world and you still want more? What the heck is wrong with you?!

Or you might have a voice that tells you to do more. You only have one life and you’re wasting it away if you don’t do something massive. Rest is for the weak. You have to keep going, achieving more, working more, trying harder.

Again, the actions you might take from this place might look different from each other, but you can sense the energy in both; it’s your inner critic talking.

If you’re listening to your inner critic, it’s actually going to be impossible for you to have either. You’ll never be satisfied with the present moment, and you’ll never be satisfied by what you achieve because neither one will ever be enough.

That’s why your inner critic needs to be fired.

These two thoughts, beliefs and actions sound different, but they are, in fact, two sides of the same coin. The sh*tty, inner critic coin that doesn’t serve you.

Ironically, choosing to be happy every day can be something that comes from your best self and uplifts you daily, or it can be a thought your inner critic uses to hold you back each and every day.

And going for big dreams, desiring to change the world can be inspiring and become your legacy that fulfills you, if it comes from your best self coin.

Or it can be something that holds you back from true happiness and joy, and makes you feel like you are never good enough if it’s from your inner critic coin.

So you see, I can’t tell with certainty which coin your thoughts are coming from. As a coach, I am trained to help my clients differentiate and understand, but from a Facebook comment or email, it’s pretty challenging.

But that’s ok – because YOU are your own best expert.

Maybe as you recognize some of these same thoughts and beliefs, you know exactly which coin your thoughts are coming from.

Awesome.

But maybe you aren’t sure what coin you’re coming from.

This is your work.

If you can master this, and understand which coin your beliefs and actions are coming from – and choose to come from the best self coin – THAT’S a game-changer. (No coin/game pun intended).

This is where you start, and what you learn to master. Each and every day.

It’s time to stop making decisions from a place of fear.

It’s time to start taking action based on where you want to be.  Where your BEST self desires to be and WHO your best self really is.

Each and every day, you can choose to honour your values and your best self.

Or you can get caught up in the beliefs of your inner critic and end up sacrificing who you truly are.

Join me live tonight for my Tuesday night Facebook or Instagram Live, or make time to watch the replay. This topic is FIRE and is a game-changer for sure.

Join me as I take you in-depth on how to tell which coin you’re listening to and operating from.

And how to continue to choose and listen to your best self, each and every day.

Friend, I’ll see you – and your best self – tonight.

PS. Photo credit to @yvonnederkx 

Don't know how to achieve your big dreams? This is for you

I’ve built my entire business, brand and truthfully, my life around the belief that you can have it all.

I’ve read the articles from so many people saying you can’t have it all.

That it’s not possible.

And I’ve shunned them all. For good reason.

Because I truly DO believe it’s possible. (Not convinced? Read this).

I have big dreams.

I have a really big goal.

My goal is to become a 7-figure entrepreneur.

My dream is to run a muti-million dollar business that changes the lives of millions of women and empowers them to have it all.

I want a million dollar business because of the impact I know I will make at that level.

And I want to challenge myself to become the woman who creates a multi-million dollar business from scratch, with all the growth and tenacity and intelligence it’s going to take.

But right now, if we’re being honest, I have no idea how to achieve it.

I don’t know all the steps, and I’m not sure what’s next.

Can you relate?

Do your dreams ever feel overwhelming?

Do you ever feel like you can’t achieve your goals because you don’t know HOW you will do it?

This message is for you, my friend.

Right now in my journey, am in a pinch point. I’m in a period of challenge.

I’m at the point where I, once again, need to test and prove that it’s possible to have it all – for myself and others.

My mission is to show others how it’s possible and WHAT is possible (having it all). Including having a multi-million dollar business.

My goal is not “realistic”.

It’s ok if yours isn’t either.

I’m not sure how I’m going to achieve it.

I’m sharing this with you in hopes that this will inspire you to also go for something you don’t know how to achieve.  

If you want it, that’s enough. Have the courage to want it, even if you don’t know how.  

If your goals and dreams look hard, and you’re not sure how you’re going to achieve it, that’s ok.

If others are saying it’s not possible, that’s not your problem.

It’s a part of the process: to be challenged.

Rising up from that challenge is what matters.

So here it is: my next goal is to create a thriving, 7 figure business that empowers women to have it all, on their terms.  While also being a fabulous mom and wife and human myself.

I’ve seen other women do it.

I’ve told other women they can do it.

I preach this sh*t.

And yet for me, some days, it’s still so hard to see HOW.

I look at my life and wonder how it’s possible for ME.

Little, old me.

I’m just a small-town girl.

I’m already so “busy”.  I solo parent for 14 days at a time.

I have family.  A real estate business I also lead.

How am I going to do it?

How will I do while also enjoying motherhood?!

And sleep… can I still do that?

But these are the voices of my inner critic who’s not sure if I can do it.

This is my self-doubt creeping up, anxious because I don’t know “how”.

Have you ever heard yourself say these things too?

Have you wondered these same things?

These are all reasons why it’s not possible.

And let me tell you, if all you look at is “how it’s not possible”, you will stay stuck.

The key here, is to start asking HOW is it possible?

So…. how IS it possible?

It’s possible if I make a commitment to myself.

I’ve been doing soul searching and I know I need to make a commitment to me.

That means committing to myself and my body.

This means exercise 5 days a week. Even if it’s a walk, a dance party, an online 10 minute Tabata workshop on YouTube. Because I’m the foundation for all good things I create and lead.

This means committing to meditating twice daily. Because if I don’t have time for this, I’m not living a life.

Your commitments might be different, but these are mine.

How it’s possible for you might look different for you, but this is how it’s possible for me.

It’s possible for me to create a multi-million dollar business that changes lives if I put my own priorities first and stop letting other people’s priorities take precedent to mine.

It’s possible if I don’t reply to every text, phone call, Instagram/Facebook message and comment.

(Honestly, I’m already not great at this but I know I have to get even worse!).

It’s possible if I commit 2 hours, 5 days a week to work after Sonoma’s gone to bed.

It’s possible if I surround myself with a community of other driven women who are doing the things I want to be doing.

It’s possible if I invest in a coach and course that will accelerate my growth and progress.

It’s possible if I co-work with other moms. And take advantage of the amazing InsideOut Fam coworking space in Vancouver.

It’s possible if I hire a nanny share. If I put my money where my mouth is and I invest in myself.

It’s possible if I do baby-sitting swaps.

It’s possible by recognizing that I might fail. And that’s ok.

It’s possible if I fail.  Fail fast. And KEEP going.

You see, I have a lot on the line.

This is a test.

Not just for myself.

But for you, too.

What I realized is that I cannot fail.

And neither can you.

I can redefine.

I can pivot.

I can take longer than I originally thought.

But I will crush it out of the park.

And so can you.

So if you don’t know the “how” for your dreams, that’s ok.

Start asking “how is it possible?” and get a few answers down on paper.

Then, start taking action on those.

Keep asking how it’s possible. Keep taking action.

You too, might fail.

You too can pivot. Redesign.

And the only way you’d ever fail is if you never tried at all.

Don’t let the how hold you back.

Get started today.

Those big dreams that you and I have?

They’re ours for a reason.

Let’s go get ‘em.

Does this hold you back?

If you’ve ever been to my website or checked out my Instagram, you’ve probably seen some of the professional photos I’ve had done.

I get compliments on my photos ALL the time (credit to the amazing Kim James Photography for her talent).

Here’s the finished product:

But I have to share with you the truth about that photo shoot and how it almost didn’t happen.

It looks beautiful and relaxed, but it certainly didn’t start that way.

If you ever doubt yourself or wonder if you’re not good enough, this is for you.

If you’re ever ashamed of your body or the way you look and hide behind it, this is for you.

This is the truth behind-the-scenes of my very first photo shoot.

I scheduled, and rescheduled this photo shoot several times.

I cancelled it, repeatedly.

I had "reasons”.

I was “busy”. Traveling. The weather sucked.

I used every excuse I thought the photographer would accept.

Do you want the truth?

The truth I've NEVER spoken out loud?

I put it off because of how I looked.

I cancelled it because I wanted to lose weight before my photo shoot.

I wanted to be skinnier. Be more toned. Look better before I immortalized myself in photos.

I was SO nervous and afraid that I put off this major up level in my business, because of how I felt about myself.

And I almost didn’t show up for my dreams because of how I looked.

I cringe saying this but I'm sharing it because it's something I definitely struggle with.

And maybe you struggle with it too.

Looking at these photos today, I wonder:

Every day, how many things do women like me NOT do because we are afraid of how we look?

Even confident, badass women like you and I.

Every morning, I've woken up with my daughter Sonoma and told her she is "beautiful, worthy and wise."  

Together, we look in the mirror and say those words out loud.

I tell my daughter that she is beautiful on the inside and it shows on the outside.

I want her to hear my words. Believe my words. Embody my words.

And I also need that message too.

Maybe you do, too.

When I tell her, I also tell myself.

I am consciously working to not allow myself to get caught in this trap - ever again.

I want you to commit to never allowing the way you look to stop you from showing up for your dreams.

First off, I'm beautiful. And so are you.

I would never look at my daughter and think a single piece of her is flawed.  Now, I'm working to build the same love and compassion for myself, my face, my hair and my body.

You would never look at a child and think there’s anything that could possibly be improved.

They are perfect and whole just the way they are.

So are you. 

So am I.

I’m embracing the fact that I'm beautiful. And as India Arie says, "every freckle on my face is where it's supposed to be."

Second, what I look like is not all of who I am.  It is not my worth. And it's not yours either.

How we FEEL about how we look matters.

How we FEEL about ourselves matters.

How you talk to yourself, see yourself, and what you believe about yourself, is everything.

My beautiful friend - and I know YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL - if you're reading this, know you're not alone in these feelings.

And it's up to you to recognize where you are being held back and call in that confidence.

Give yourself love.

Be beautiful. Inside and out.

You are so loved.  

Have the honest conversation with yourself to find out if there’s somewhere in your life where you’re holding yourself back too.

And commit to showing up as you, exactly how you are.  As your beautiful self.

Do that Facebook Live you’ve been saying you’ll do for months.

Start the Instagram account.

Share the photo of you on vacation in a bathing suit.

Wear a bikini to the pool because you want to.

Book the photo shoot for your headshot.

Apply to be a speaker at a local conference.

Put your hand up to do the presentation at work in front the leadership team.

Because you are beautiful, inside and out.

Because there is nothing that shines through more than confidence and authenticity.

You are so much more than how you look.

And it’s time to show the world ALL your value.

Most of all, it’s time to own every piece of you that is oh-so-amazing.

Show up and show yourself. For your goals. For your dreams.

Show up for your beautiful self.

Yours truly,

Lisa Michaud

Success Coach & Speaker

PS. Do people still sign off with “yours truly”?  I don’t know but I just did it. Here’s a behind-the-scenes photo from that photo-shoot. Now you know the story and can see the photos behind the photos.

PPS.  I'm going live tonight to answer your questions and go in depth on this topic on Facebook HERE.

Join me every Tuesday night between 8:30 pm and 9:30 pm PST on Facebook live HERE or Instagram HERE for inspiration, wisdom, tools, insights and all your questions answered.

See you tonight!